


And all too quickly, everything is gone.

by Kotonohaku



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Pure and simple, one shot of peter whump, this is just angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2019-02-27 05:10:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13241121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kotonohaku/pseuds/Kotonohaku
Summary: It's like existing in his own body is becoming a fight, and he's terrified to find out what he's up against.





	And all too quickly, everything is gone.

He's started having nightmares. 

The awful, drawn out kind that are startlingly clear, horrible and gruesome, but just possible enough to feel real. A pitch-black face, with wide, pale eyes like the lenses from his suit, leers at him from a mirror.

Its jaw unhinges; rows of long, needle-sharp teeth grin at him as he can only stand frozen in fear. It whispers to him constantly during these dreams, urges to kill and maim and destroy. 

Peter can’t quite put a finger on when it started, or where it even came from. He gets only flashes of a patrol gone wrong, black tendrils whipping out at him from a crater in Central Park, latching onto him, crawling down his throat, stifling his screams. 

He always forgets the details before he’s really awake. 

Peter's got the worst luck of anyone he's ever known, and by some sick twist of fate whatever hell this is chose him. 

He can feel himself slipping away every day and every hour, but there's an overpowering compulsion to tell no one. Every thought of seeking help is quashed before it's formed, and before long he can't tell its garbled thoughts from his own. 

It feels like he's trying desperately to climb a rope of slick silk, and every grasp towards the top sends him sliding further. It's a slow, agonizing descent. It would have almost been a mercy for it to have happened all at once. 

It's the little things that go first: he can't remember getting home, going to bed, waking up, just the in-betweens. 

He's sure it's just exhaustion, and cuts back on patrolling late at night. 

When it starts to encroach on his school day he doesn't know what to think at first. MJ asks him why he wasn’t at decathlon practice, and for once he has no excuse because he doesn't know either.

He'll “wake up” to Ned waving a hand in front of his face at lunch, and he'll realize he doesn't remember how he got there. 

The panic sets in once he's missing days at a time; this is no longer something he can brush off as lack of sleep. Every time Peter floats to consciousness, back into control of his own muscles, he feels more and more tired. 

It's like existing in his own body is becoming a fight, and he's terrified to find out what he's up against. 

Eventually, it stops happening at all, and the puppeteering becomes his only face. 

Brief flashes come to him sometimes now, and he can only see through his own eyes like a window. 

Aunt May’s final breaths. 

Ned screaming and trying to run as rubble rains down from the collapsing ceiling. 

Mr. Stark’s face, alarmed and concerned, as a black, inky substance melts out of Peter's skin and envelopes him. 

It’s becoming a comforting feeling, actually. He finds he's not thinking much at all anymore, and it's almost a relief. 

Whatever has taken his body for its own has at least made it a surprisingly pleasant experience.

It's definitely not the worst way to die, he thinks, as he gets a glimpse of the Avengers suited up, battle-ready, and staring at him with a mix of horror and regret. 

Disappearing seems merciful compared to how his parents died. His uncle. May. No more grieving. No more loss. 

He smiles, and it's the last thing he remembers.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a brief one shot because I was inspired by the INCREDIBLE Silent Night on ff.net by Queen of Crystallopia! I'm posting it from mobile so hopefully it goes up right.


End file.
